xroads of destiny

i borrowed this title from an animation i was watching this afternoon,"aang the last airbender".i have this extreme affinity to cartoons (forever nick fan!) and i get pretty crazy over certain programs.

as usual,predicaments have implored me to write again. apart from sex,writing is my second fix. i can't have both at the same time though.hehehe.

i am now sitting in a lounge chair in a cozy boutique hotel in the heart of downtown davao city. a few seconds ago i was hearing wheels screeching hard on asphalt beckoning a possible road mishap. i would have wanted to order a bottle of beer or maybe a glass of good ole red wine but i still have to take some medicine later for my colds and more importantly to make me drowsy enough not to hear or mind my roommate's choleric snores.

lack of personal space has been an issue of mine since i was 8 years old.i used to have my own room in a family i totally despised then. then, personal space i found in the form of an old battered radio broadcasting bringing loco ricardo diaz all the way from the west coast. rick dee's weekly top forty was my prozac.

a japanese guest a few tables across was babbling in nipongo with a heck of a volume it just reminded me that only my name and a few phrases are all i have left from the months of japanese class i had a few years way back.watashi wa kurisu jan desu.watashi was sukushi nihon go wakarimasu.

when this year began i said to myself that this is gonna be my year after 12 years of tumult and metamorphoses.i am basing this statement to what i experienced 12 years ago when i was at the some sort of apex. it has been more than six months and looking now, yeah, i have accomplished something. but something is not everything. and now in this very moment, i am telling myself that in this life you need not to have everything.

contentment.happiness.values.friends.fears.hesitations.escapism.the decision to face them all hook, line and sinker. as i try to put up these resolutions i realise i need divine guidance and the love of those people that matters to me the most.

i miss cebu, i miss my old life. yes, after a year of work i declare for the nth time that i am burnt-out.i really have no idea how to get through and breakthrough, i just know that i have to.any definite reason i have no solid statement to say.forgive my incoherence.

one day at a time.my microbio professor used to say that.

dear reader thank you very much for lending the time reading part and parcel of my being a drama queen. i myself will review this blog in time and rate this from that point of view.i hope it will be better point of view,i dearly hope so.